I swear what she said were true enough to be put down in words. True enough- it still holds my breath, suffocating me like my head is strangled around a rope, a gruesomely tight rope, aching all over again on the scars that causes me such pain, it brings me down in the memory lane when that day happened; it was such a beautifully wounded misery (that day) and it still drags. It still drags and echos and replays keep on going through my mind again and again and again and again and again and again, with just the mention or a sight of her name.
She must have been proud, that her memory of you, haunts me.
She must have been happy, seeing you, slowly giving up on me. She must have been impatient, just to tell you "I've told you". She must have been.
Most probably I have been in denial, all along. Denial is sweet, like revenge, but revenge gives so much satisfaction that allows you to indeed letting it all go, after it is reached. But denial is merely pain. A good pain I shall say. Denial brings you strength sometimes to go through the days, of sorrows rather than laughter; it makes you feel a little more better when in fact denial is nothing but a lie. A whispered lie through your little evil thought, that denies everything horrific that you want to feel better about. I hate denial. Though denial did good stuffs on me, such as forgetting the reality. Reality is painful no matter how you want to make it sounds good or maybe a little closer to good, but reality is. It's just is.
She, the reason of all my fears and pain and sorrow and most importantly avenge. She must get what she deserves. If holding grudges is a bad thing, let's recalled what she had done. She destroyed me. And all that's left in me, is mere revenge.
See you in hell, whore.
xox
